Value your friendship with the other person first and foremost. Remember it is what you make out of the relating with another. Don’t assume things. Don’t compare things. Communicate and respect each others’ opinions. Always keep in mind HOW things can be worked…without quitting one another…unfortunately, Western media has colored relationships as all sweet and honey with no issues or simply as bitter with conflicts.
Human beings will always stay bonded if they are governed by similar ideologies and a similar value system, despite the fights and conflicts.
Related posts:
- Mama. Mothers. And Other Days. May 13, 2012. Still Sundays I’ve always liked the time before...
- “The Beauty Myth” Mama says it is to men’s advantage to recognize the reservoir...
very true, the key is “similar ideologies”.
Do you think there’s a way of reaching harmony without similar ideologies?
@Vusi Sindane – mama says it is challenging. and it depends how you describe ‘harmony’…some people consider both people living together but separate lives as harmony and others don’t.
i say no.
my parents have been married for over 30 years now and they have been through a lot together…what has kept them together is a common vision or at least relentless support from one to another for another’s goals, even when it is not mutual per se… but you can only do that if you have a similar ideologies…
that’s the hard part…you think it would be easy to find someone that shares core values with you, but it takes a lot of work and a lot of time. my worst fear is sitting across from the one i love and him saying something that my heart will never be able to understand.
mama is wise, wise, wise…
@tish – a heart will understand if the people involved have similar ideologies…
if we are growing, we are always changing, Tish, implicit in that is that we are always trying to understand ourselves and perhaps another…
but after a certain [chronological] age…certain ideologies (life style choices and bigger vision of every day living) become our blueprint…they are not just to be understood but lived. So, while we may not understand, we love and support because we ‘get it’ on another level.
I Like “always keep in mind how things can be worked”. Mama couldn’t have said it better. It is a conscious choice for both in the relationship!Thanks for sharing mama’s wise words with us!
@Londiwe -YOU nailed it even deeper. It is a conscious choice for both parties.
Ah-ha, your mother has emerged from the shadows and shown herself to be quite like you in some important ways. Bold. Confident. Wise. Articulate. Please extend my congratulations for her successful maiden voyage, and encourage her back!
Maybe we’ll be hearing from her on twitter before long?!?!
Your mama seems like a wise and beautiful woman!